Awkward things happen at my gym

I go to gym usually four times a week. I’m not an exercise addict, but I like working out. I feel really good after. I love social aspect of gym as well.  I can meet, chat and mingle with people. All is fun but I have an issue with my gym.  When ever I go to men’s locker room, I pick a quiet corner and start getting ready for my workout. For some reason after 29 seconds it gets insanely crowded around me.

Imagine five semi nude guys in 99 square feet!! A guy comes right off the bat cardio machine and takes his clothes off. The other one just arrives and decides to pick the next locker. This list can go on and on. As if I were a delicate flower and butterflies want to land on me. I don’t know why the HECK is that?? Why ME??!!! Honestly! Does anyone else have the same problem? 

When it is too crowded around me, I start sweating. My heartbeat accelerates. I get really tense. Tension makes me say embarrassing things.I remember once, I was sitting on the bench and tying my shoe laces. A really cute guy came to use his locker. Surprise! Surprise! His locker was located right above mine. I got up and tried to open up space for him. The guy looked very familiar. I instantly realized he was the same boy had the same locker yesterday.  I said “DEJAVU! Weren’t you on top of me yesterday?”

—HOLLY! MOLLY! ANGELINA JOLIE!!! Did I just say that? Great! He thinks I’m a slut!!!!--While I was debating myself, he laughed and said “ NO! Iwasn't! But It would be delightful, if I get the opportunity.” I blushed.

Not only awkward conversations take place also so many embarrassing incidents happened to me. Last week I was done with my workout, looking forward to chill out in steam room. I went by my locker, after 14 seconds the left locker guy came. He was a huge, hairy, and sweaty man. (OH! Geez! I thought these kinds slept through winter. HUH!")

Okeyyy!! I shifted my stuff on the bench to other side. Once I got comfortable, I took off my short and underwear. I was reaching my towel to cover my hoo-hoo. Miraculously the right locker guy popped up from nowhere. He dropped his wet, stinky sweatshirt on my clean towel. YUCK!! Talking about BAD things happen to good people!!! I covered my jewel box with my right hand and grabbed the towel with my left hand. I lost my balance. I was almost falling on enormous, hairy, sweaty guy. Thank God! I put myself together! It would have been revolting!
I was able to cover my cookie luckily. I sat down on the bench and bent over to find my shower kit in my bag. While I was straightening my upper body, giant man turned back. In a flash my nose reached the same level with his hairy monster. Tip of my nose dipped into his long pubes. Eew! Eeeww!  Eeeewwww!  What a pungent smell!! Gurrk! I reflexively turned my head back. Suddenly my mouth and my nose were in the right locker guy’s crack. OH MY GOD!! GROSS!!!

Literally I smelled his buns I wanted to die, vanish and if it is possible evaporate!! I felt ill. dizzy and high on his CRACK!! I just smelled pubes and tasted a butt just before my dinner time!!! Thank you guys for early bird special!

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