As he announced us as husband and husband, I was crying...

1/29/10—

Dear Diary, 

Brian and I woke up very early this morning. We both were so excited. This was the day we had have been waiting for. We both put our suits on enthusiastically. Yes! Today was our wedding day. Even if I had said all those years “We have been together for eight years. In my mind we are already married”, we both had decided to get married without a big, riot wedding. After eight years relationship, it was time. Brian had worked really hard to arrange everything. He had found a place and justice of the peace in Connecticut. Since we had been living in Manhattan, making all those arrangements had been very difficult for us. 

We hopped on our rental car. I don’t know if I mentioned you before, but Brian and I are geographically disabled.  This trip was not an exception at all. Instead of turning right we took the George Washington Bridge. For long time we drove in New Jersey instead of Connecticut.  It was so us. Getting lost is always a part of our route trips. After first incident we got lost two more times. I got very tense. I declared “This marriage already is not going to the right direction. I’m having second thoughts!” and I asked for a divorce before we didn’t even get married. How silly goose of me! 

We arrived to Weston city hall. We were running late.  We were afraid that  justice of the peace had already left. Luckily he was there waiting for us. His name was Joe. He looked 100 years old to me. After filling out multiple papers with town clerk Dana, we all walked into a big room where Joe was going to conduct our ceremony.

Brian and I were holding each other hands. I was trembling. When we respectively said “I do”, there was no trace of hesitation in our voices. As Joe announced us as husband and husband, I was crying little.  While Dana was putting last touches on our marriage license, Joe gave us a nice marriage lecture.

Brian asked “So Joe! How long have you been married?”

“I was married for 48 years. My wife passed away 10 years ago. It has been very empty since then”

I felt suddenly numb. Brian got so emotional “It must have been very hard for you”

Joe answered “I was very lucky to have my wife for 48 years. It was so wonderful. Some people never have that in their life “

Suddenly I realized I never thought about losing Brian. I always took him granted. I got chills!!!

We arrived to our lovely hotel. It was by the river in Westport. I loved the historic details of the place. Our room's name was Lemon Tree. It was so romantic. After quick check in, we went to a restaurant. We ordered champagne to celebrate. We had a very delicious wedding lunch. It was time for our wedding cake. Normally we both wouldn’t order deserts. It was our wedding day and we had to have it. I ordered a big piece of carrot cake. Brian picked an enormous pecan pie for himself. So far everything was so magical and modest. I wasn’t even feeling like married. It was like another fun day.

When we got back to our honeymoon nest, it hit on me. He was no longer my boyfriend. He was my husband. All those years I said “Marriage is not that important. I feel like we are already married”. That statement turned out a big fat nonsense. It was a totally different feeling.

OH Diary! You have to get married in order to understand me. What am I saying?? You are just a diary!! You can’t get married. Let me explain. I felt more confident, secure and at the same time I felt more responsibilities on my shoulder. 8 years ago our relationship was a caterpillar. It grew over the years. After this marriage our relationship became a beautiful butterfly.  I knew that point we both had to give more attention to keep our delicate butterfly alive.

After flirty, kinky, lazy afternoon in the room it was time for dinner. It was very cold Friday night. Even river was frozen. I was so surprised to see a river like that. I had never seen such a thing before. We went a romantic Italian restaurant. We were both glooming.  After dinner we walked back to our hotel companied by ice cold weather.  Frozenness of the night erased our dizziness and tiredness which was the natural result of a long day.We got to our room with so much love and happiness. Quickly we slipped into our bed as husband and husband.

A little note said on the door “Please don’t disturb! We are on our honeymoon!”

____

To be continued with “On first day of out  marriage one of us could have become a sad, lonely widow!”

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